Will you marry me?

Angelina Kalashnikova

- Hello, my sweet pumpkin.

- Could you please stop calling me that? I don’t even look like one.


- And how should I call you, my sunshine?

- It’s Jane, just Jane, don’t you remember my name?

- Oh well, as you wish, pumpkin Jane.

- OK, well, I’m going to study now, you know, for my test.

- Will you marry me?

- What? No, seriously, what?

- I love you so much and you love me, we should become a loving married couple…

- Listen. Jared. Love doesn’t obligate us to get married, I want to move abroad, remember? And find a nice job, buy a car, a house.  Yes, if it is ok with you, you can move with me. But what in god’s sake will we do if we get married now, while being students? Rent one room and do each other’s homework as a showing of a healthy family?

- Stop being ridiculous, people get married when they want to, not when they feel comfortable enough. You know, I will convinceyou.

- And then get a divorce in a year or so? What do you think a marriage is? A sparkling unicorn made of rainbow that brings happiness to everyone who is around?

- Well, not literally, I’m not a baby, but…

- Oh, come on. Serious relationship is a hard work, harder than you can bear, my sweet unicorn and that’s why we won’t get married unless I am sure I want to connect my life with uhm… you. No words left to describe a man who still doesn’t know what to do with his life, but wants to take care of mine. Please, be patient and wait, unless you want to sink our relationship. We need to wait, ok? Can I go now?

- Yes, sweetheart, only one question that bothers me.

- Yeah?

- Will you marry me?