As the alarm clock rings at 7:30 a.m.,
thousands of hammers begin to pound in his head, and this is because his body thirsts for another glass of brandy. Aidan has difficulty remembering how he managed to put himself into the bed after having drunk the bottle of exclusive brandy he bought in Cuba when he was still the company’s best lawyer. His hands are shaking like window glass during the thunderstorm. Aidan enters the tiny bathroom, looks into his own eyes in the filthy mirror, and sees blue cornflowers. After half a minute of glazing, he realizes these are his mother’s eyes.
On that day, she must have woken up early because the sky was pink, and the sun rays were expanding as though someone had spilt a glass of wine. The white wall of Aidan’s room became slightly red, which made him feel terrified. He heard her footsteps in the house and closed his eyes. She was singing her favourite ballad about the girl who was waiting for her lover’s return from the war. After the second chorus, dead silence fell on the house. Aidan wondered if he was already dead or there was someone dead nearby. He burst into anger and bite his lip to the blood. How could he wish she was not alive?! Despite all her tricks that he was fed up with, she was his closest person in the world, his mother. Aidan nodded off for a few minutes. That could not have been hours because the wall was still painted light red. He felt the smell of baking toasts. She was a bad cook, but the toasts she made were decent. After a while, Aidan heard his mother approaching his room. He pretended he was still sleeping. Uneasy breathing started, which meant she tried to calm down.
“Hey, Aidan,” she said, “get up, son. I have cooked toasts. You can eat them with jam.”
“What time is it?”
“Come on, naughty boy!” she said with irritation. “Don’t be like your father!”
Aidan did not know what to answer. He knew he had to wake up so as not to sparkle her anger.
“Well, I’m sorry, dear son. I’ve overreacted.”
“It’s OK, Mom. I’m coming.”
A nervous smile went across her face.
Aidan dressed up and climbed down. His mother soon appeared in the kitchen wearing a blue dress.
“It matches my eyes, doesn’t it?” she asked.
“Yeah, Mom. You’re gorgeous.”
“Yes, a gorgeous divorcee-eeeeee!”
Her mad laughter occupied the room.
“I used to be gorgeous Brenda, but this did not stop your father from leaving!”
“Please, stop this, Mum!”
“You, a miserable copy of your lustful Daddy!”
“Mom, please, don’t…”
“I will be upstairs. Don’t disturb me-eeeeee!”
After Aidan finished his breakfast, he went on a bicycle ride. He spent the whole day in the field reading novel The Red Dragon. When the evening sky became purple, he decided to go back home. He returned and wanted to have supper but only found that his mother had cooked nothing. Aidan felt guilty and thought he had to apologize for being somewhat impatient. When he came into his mother’s bedroom, she was not there. Aidan saw light coming from the bathroom, but he did not hear water running.
“Mom, I’m back home. Are you alright?”
She did not reply.
“I’m coming, OK?”
Aidan entered the room and shuddered. His mother was lying in the bathroom with blood streaming from her slashed wrists. Her face was pale, and her eyes were empty but still watery.
“Oh God! Mom, don’t die, please!” he shouted.
Aidan has come out of the blackout. He is still standing in front of the mirror and looking into his mother’s eyes. Aidan opens the water to wash his face. He has to hurry up in order to be on time at the first meeting of anonymous alcoholics. Yes, his mother Brenda had bipolar disorder, but he cannot help feeling guilty. Aidan does not drink wine, only beverages of different colour
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