Colorful Feelings by Alisa Pyaskovska

Everything around was so poorly hazel
that he didn’t even think of the true colors of the surrounding world. He was a colorblind person, but that wasn’t the case here. He couldn’t tell red from yellow, but his picture of the world remained quite colorful. Except from today. Today was the day when every color was the shade of marsh. He was disgusted by the emptiness of people, whom he considered as friends. He was disappointed in himself – he thought, regardless of his colorblindness, he could see the nature of human soul. He thought he was careful, creating bonds with people. He thought that everything he put them through has tested them enough to be reliable and safe. Moreover, he had tremendously rich history of betrayals and disappointments.
It was far away in the times when he was much younger and more naïve. The day when everything has changed, he remembered until this moment. He was the reason people died – colors started disappearing. Then everything went wrong – the series of courts made him believe that nothing good can ever happen to a colorblind person. Though it definitely was spurious correlation, his young brain could not see it. Then he discovered that his wife cheated on him and that his friends started telling stories about “weird friend who killed people because he couldn’t tell red from yellow and yellow from green”. After the sentence came out, and he was told to go to a doctor, he decided to burn all the bridges. His life – blank canvas. New, white, pure. Does not include some colors, but still with hope for the future.
And now again. The same unfinished picture but everything seems black and white. Friends turned out to be fake; girlfriend never understood his “colorblindness” and family... Family told him that he is sick person and that he needs treatment. Treatment, huh? That is funny, how he, colorblind guy, seeing now all colors of the same shade, suddenly saw everything in its true colors. True colors of the world were poorly hazel and sometimes mustard. Only after losing his ability to see all the shades of every color on the planet, he understood which colors of the surrounding people were true. Red, green, violet. He couldn’t see them now but he felt them. Red anger at son who turned out to be strange, green hypocrisy of friends, violet meanness of the women he loved. And his greyish hazel despair.