Frequent Guests in her Life by Lada Sorokina

“Success” is her middle name.
The first name is written on a door’s sign to her office — the director of a multinational company «TransAvia».
Leila is a beautiful woman in her prime. She is 33 years old, and she does not have a loved one. Although she works surrounded by men more than women, and many of them try to get her attention. Unfortunately for them, she is as strong as a steel. It is uncommon for her to accept invitation for a cup of coffee or seek help from a man. Nevertheless, nobody can call her a damned wretch or an ice queen, which often happens with lonely young leaders. Nobody also understands her.
The secret is in one trait. Leila is afraid of love. Love has meant guilt for her since 2005. She is afraid to let someone down and be wrong again. “How could it be?” you will ask, and I will answer.
Leila was just a girl from a small town who had a shimmering dream to work in a big city. She also had got a deeper love in her eighteenth. This love inspired her and gave hope. It seemed like they were a match made in heaven. They had been together for two years, and in that fateful year, Leila discovered that she was pregnant.
She had a choice between being a young mother and wife, and going for a dream. She opted for her shimmering dream of being a successful person in a big city. He could not forgive her, so they broke up.
The first five years, she believed that everything went as it should be. She studied in university well, became a successful worker and moved up the ladder. She was neither interested in romantic stories, nor in children-touchy-feely stuff.
Six years ago, once, she could not pass calmly a children’s playground. She seemed to feel a stab in the stomach when a child nearby started calling, «Mummy, mom! ».
That day Leila went in an empty flat and suddenly realized that she would never be able to hear a child’s stomp in her house. That day she took an old picture with her beloved. She used to keep this photo in a night stand, in memory of those times. Leila looked at it for a minute or two. Then, gained strength, she tore the photo into small pieces and burst into tears. She was unable to concentrate on her work tasks. It was difficult to get used to the thought that, in fact, her career never hugs her like a kindred person.
From that moment, she completely and irrevocably avoids men, dates and questions about children. From that moment, feeling of guilt and sorrow of the lost are frequent guests in her life.